A long Day!

It certainly was a long day.. Didnt start that way though! I can still hear the voice, the message!
Why does it pain more? Wish I was around to hold you so close that nobody would hurt you , - ever. Nothing bad would befall you..
Save you from the rest of the world and keep you happy.
Funny how I always thought you were more responsible and how things turned out a couple of weeks back.

I do not know why but I cried!!

After all these years I realized one important thing – it is easier to gain wait. But it is hell a lot tougher to get it off.. thing is it adds up some calories at a time without you even realizing it. I mean you cant say no if the oriya guy comes back from his hometown carrying small curvy burfis whose fluffy white is calling out your name.
Nor can you ignore those cute round pedas that fit into your hands like they are made to be held and savored.
Throw in a milk cake here (happy birthday ji) or a Kaju kathli there (I have a son jo karega mera naam roushan) you just cant get rid of them. Some people are really kind. They bring two dabbas of pure ghee, high fat, incontrollable stuff like ladoos, kala jamuns, rasgullas, govas even Jangris and Jalebis. But nothing takes the cake like kaesar peda. I mean they are soft, there is a lovely, mild yet overpowering orangish yellow with a slice of badam playing hide and seek amidst that sweety richness – you can only wish you are born a kesar peda next birth J
Okie I am not a big enemy of all the savouries either. If the time is 5.45 pm and you are hungry (or not) you can silently make your way to the chat section where the north Indian chat guy teaches us national integrity – I eat all. Be it aloo chat(too much of big plump aloo still paisa vasool huh?) or dahi paapdi, dahi samosae J or samosa chenna, or just a mixed chat (for people who want everything in life… well almost!!)
When I wake up next morning and my favorite dress doesn’t fit me in a lotta places I am aghast!! How can I get so fat? Man I am so not going to eat anything sweet/oily today. I sit in my cubicle when I get a mail –
“Chocolates from US at my desk. Pls help yourself.
P.S – our onsite manager has sent in Ferrero Roschers just for our team“
Dress? What dress?

The worst day of my-life-so-far

Ok it is official. Today has been the worst day of my life. For a lot of reasons.
It feels like missing that teddy bear.
Or having to give a guest your favorite candy.
Like missing the first rank because your best friend forgets to mention that she was science teacher’s pet.
Like missing your dream company because, the water lorry split water on you, on the way to the interview.
Like when you realize that the guy you have a crush on, has a crush on your enemy.
Like when they tell you that you are waitlisted for a college @ 253 when they have only 240 seats.
I don’t want to move on. For once I want to stay here and re- live my happy moments. Every single one of them.

I miss Kung Fu Panda at a time like this.

Grand Master Oogway could always find a solution for my problems :(

I miss a lot of stuff. It didn’t have to end this way. It didnt have to end at all!!

React to this!!

Every morning I wake up I tell myself a lot of things…
I promise not to react/emote to any situation. I told myself that in two years I have seen enough to understand that S**t happens and you cannot prevent it. But you can prevent it from getting ugly. You can control your reaction to it, and the faster you try finding a solution, the faster everybody gets outta office. (Even easier is to push it right back to onsite – ha ha take that!!)
I tell myself that I will stay positive irrespective of what happens to me today. Causes there are days which start really bad then get a total make over (not unlike our desi Jassi) and end up giving you something to celebrate for. There are also days which start perfect (I mean I start early, the train comes in just as I touch the platform so I don’t have to wait and the weather gets slightly windy, my music player starts my favorite song ) and them suddenly it also takes a big U –turn
P.S: oh! Don’t ask. My TL comes back with a huge set of C and UNIX stuff to be done (me and programming are like water and wine) with a 5.00 pm deadline. Worst was this – my module was descoped. But I have been testing it chumma cause they were billing me and didn’t want me to be idle (ok I dint test much but this idle time introduced me to quite a set of yahoo and other blogs). One fine day, my manager dropped a gundu* the descoped module is the starting point of testing for two other modules that is waiting to get to CIT (component level testing). And that the deadline was the next day. So effectively I had two days to make it work. When I tried executing a code that morning it didn’t budge, irrespective of testing umpteen times (I did work a couple of times when my internet was down you know :D) I was slogging my ass off for two days trying everything I had learnt in my two years time. But nothing worked. Then one day this other lady in my team s asked to help in, she tries and lo and behold it is working. (BTW I kept asking her what she did and she said- I did NOTHING!!!beat that)
Ok back to the topic. I am writing this because I am feeling stupid. And I am feeling stupid because I couldn’t control my reaction for that one second.
Stupid cause I (am-a-urban-woman-you-cant-give-me-crap – that’s me) had a fight with a work-is-my-first-all-else-comes-next dude. My other guy friend says (quoting his exact words) “Guyz are meant to be like that. Especially, the responsible ones. See, they would want to work hard (read it as all the time) because they would want to take care of their family. Their wives will be happy. They will be financially secure. I wish I could work like that too” What is with all these guyz?
Well I have a theory (these days I have one for everything!!)
Some five years back guys had to compete only with themselves and the other guys. I guess this day, not only are they competing not only with the dames, but also the dame’s feminine beauty. (Survey says beautiful people get their way more often. [If you are a beautiful gal the deal just got better for you baby!!] Don’t believe me? Go Google!)
But our fellow guys didn’t have to worry much. The guy bonding is stronger than anything else. They have this strange understanding, that they’d take the new guy into their wing and teach them with a passion like Dronacharya and Arjuna. Even the great Don Corleone took Micheal under his wing to teach him his worldly knowledge. Plus there is these general idea that – hey man don’t sweat. She might put all that effort until she gets married. It is the guy who’ll support the company in the long run.
And we let them get away with that. (I still hope I can stop reacting everything that happens around me. Doesn’t see that happening in the near future :{ )
I only have this suggestion to all those men who consider Work more important than anything else – Call it a plea too..
I understand that work comes first. I understand work pays for your laptops, your X boxes, your fancy tees and treats. But work will not pay for your youth, nor will it give back the lost time of your lives. It will certainly not make your lady love blush like she did when she saw you first time. I am not saying you have to chuck work and leave at 6. I am saying make some time in a day for your hobbies and certainly some time for your lady. After all doesn’t she deserve an hour of your time everyday?




Gundu – in this sense means a bombshell people.

The Chills and Thrills of Waiting

We All have one thing in common in our life. The Wait.



We have waited for the bus to arrive, for our friend to turn up, for our lady love (erm err the men too :D ), for our offical letters, for a particular date or even just hoping and waiting that it'd be 12.00 pm on the day of your birthday. (ha ha ask me.. I used to live that moment 6 months before that start of my b'day month!!)

Well certain 'wait's are happiest. they bring joy because you know you are going to enjoy it. the best part is the wait makes us more happy than the thing/place/happening itself.

And then there is the wait that pains. Like getting your results. They make you nervous, swings your mood. It eats up your time and your consciousness.
I am experiencing the latter. Hate the wait. Hate the 10 or so days where you have to remain patient. One moment you are confident, the next so distraught. Starry eyed, spaced-out. The sand flows noiselessly, the droplets of time slips unnoticed. The sun sets in the horizon, the pathways get dark. There is a shimer of hope, a distant candle that burns. Hope lifts its head as the night sets in and the wait continues………….

Mixed Bag o Colors

I still remember watching the movie Tomb Raider. Angelina Jolie was awesome as she performed all those stunts. There is this scene when they are standing at this old temple trying everything to find the missing piece of the pyramid when the villan looks at his (very special !!!) clock and says Tempus Fugit


................or in layman terms - TIME FliES




Time flies.. and whoa it does real fast. It has been nearly two years since I joined here, which means it has been two years since college.. (Okie let me stop shouting that out :p)

Well even the saturdays and sundays fly too soon... and I find myself back on my cubicle on a monday morning like nothin happened. And that explains why Itz taken me a long time to bring myself to complete this blog.

So I watched Khelein hum jee jaan se yesterday.. Not a bad movie though. Thoroughly enjoyed the background score.. Deepika had nothimg muchto do except to carry acids and look beautiful and skinny and being called Kolpona(Have always loved Bengali:)). But yes Abhishek B. I totally am for your attempt to take up a movie like this, but seriously someone needs to teach him how to express pain with your eyes when you can barely speak... (Come on dont tell me Ash doesnt put you on the one of those spots!! Or are they the lovely-dovey couple the media projects them to be?)

Well talking about this i remembered watching a couple of episodes of the new season of Koffee with Karan..

the First Guests of the season was Abhi-Ash. The guy looked pretty subtle to me compared to his bubbly self and his super self confidence that we saw in the last seasons.. But the Show-stealer (can i say that?) was the second episode's Ranbir Kapoor. Okie I am not a big fan of his hulky frame (but hey loved that towel song in Saawariya btw.. wink!wink!!!) But what I loved about him was his diplomacy. You'd see him at ease dodging out of every personal question thrown out at him.. I'd really liked listening to him I'm sure so did Karan which was why a lot of questions where directed to him but he was also good enough to re-direct the appropriate ones to the silent and (l'l) shy Imran..

It then dawned upon me that, we are a generation that irrespective of whatever profession we may be in, are clever and calculating and possess adequate skills to make most out of what we have.. Atleast thats one thing that I see in common @ my work place.

and yup Diplomats run the world.

P.S : 1. One of my friends told me that If I ever wanted to be a HR I should be more active in Facebook and the like.. Im still trying my friend but sometimes I'd like to get back to my books. Guess that has to wait.. :)

2. Now thats ont hing Im going to strike off from my long list of to do things - Watch a movie in a empty theatre (or almost empty :) as the theatre that i had gone to watch the movie khalein... was literally empty save for 11 people (including me and my sis!!))

Thanks for sitting through that one.. and Im off now.

Have a great week ahead.

Long Time... really Loooong Time

well hi :)

I understand that it has been a really long time since I said hi. Would you believe if I tell u work takes its toll? (OK neither would I)

I am on a 3 week vacation - to prepare for CAT one last time!! Funny alright but somehow this time the exam seems to have more importance in my life than all other times - maybe because all of my life's answers are here.

Im 23 and frankly I dont know what I want in my life. Do I want to be one of those hot-shot business woman in classic formals - short hair - great attitude-cool laptop and high accent tones? (ha ha you bet!!!) do I want to be one of those over acheiving-night staying-social life nil-IT professional? or be a nice work-life-balancing woman who's losing most of her friends to marriage and might be pushed to do so one day?

Yup you heard it right. this is also the age where if you are a guy, most of your college-mates or work pals (gals in both the cases, fellas) inviting you for their marriage. if you are a Gal then things get even tough for you.. You will be put in a phase where most of those that you know or where close with are getting married. Most of the gal-get-togethers will talk bout the guys that they have seen in pics or straight or how the process went or how nice he is - with a very obvious hint of shyness and fair display of rosy cheeks seen so many times in those rom com movies. Worse still if they are engaged or about-to-be.

Do I hate that? Heck no. The part I hate is this... the discussion slowly turns to hey how bout you? I try looking bored and say marriage? well Im not sure if I want something like that now...

That does it. they drown you with advices on why you should get married before you turn 25, talk bout everything from financial stability to support and life and all that. the less patient friend mocks you right out saying ha ha planning for a sixtieth marriage directly? Wow real funny huh?

Here's the real deal...

I totally believe in marriage. But not now? See I have not figured out what I want to be. I dont know what exactly I like. All I ask for is 2 years of time - to be more mature and understand and come in terms with life.

And thats why I need to crack CAT this time (BTW my exam's on 19th the next friday). To escape form all of this and much more. (and to become that hotshot businesswoman I was talking about ppl ;) )